“THE YOUNG BOY said to his grandfather, ‘I have two wolves barking inside of me. The first wolf is filled with anger, hatred, bitterness, and mostly revenge. The second wolf inside of me is filled with love, kindness compassion and mostly forgiveness. Which wolf do you think will win?’
The grandfather responded, ‘Whichever one you feed.’”
Wow what truth!
Take a minute and ask yourself, “which wolf do I feed?”
And then take it a step further and reflect on which wolf feasts when you are going through a rough time. Do you bring in the second wolf of self-love or do you stuff the wolf of self-bashing?
How do you treat yourself? Be honest. It has everything to do with your happiness.
If you are constantly beating yourself up with judgment, criticism and guilt you aren’t going to have the mental or physical strength to presence as the woman you want to be.
On the other hand, if you support yourself with gentle, kind nurturing thoughts it’s going to be much easier to feel joyful and show up as the empowered leading lady of your life.
The Greek philosopher Epictetus said: “First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.”
So who do you want to be?
It’s important to have a clear vision and knowing of who you want to be and equally important to take actions that support your desire.
First create a clear picture of who that woman is –design her from the inside out. A great way to do this is to sit with a journal and write down character traits and qualities that inspire you or that you admire and wish to adopt.
Next thumb through magazines – what style of dressing attracts you and expresses your personality and feminine essence?
If you find one picture that says it all rip it out and put it where you’ll see it daily (when I was divorcing I found a picture of Manola Blahnik shoes that symbolized everything I wanted to become and put it on my bulletin board at work – LOL – but hey, just looking at it lifted my spirits!)
You may also find several pictures that speak to you and create a collage. The idea is to become clear about who you want to become and stay focused on this.
Next you want to notice what stops you from becoming this unforgettable woman. What thoughts run through your mind, what fears paralyze you and keep you stuck?
What lies are you telling yourself about what’s possible for you. What negative voices are telling you, “ha, who are you kidding, you’ll never pull that off, you’re too old, not good enough, not special enough …blah, blah, blah – feeding that annoying attack wolf again.
Whoooah, let’s pause, take a breath and turn this wolf around!
How, you might ask, do you do that?